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To me, crossdressing is wearing clothes that are traditionally associated with a different gender. A boy wearing a dress, a girl wearing a necktie. I do not think clothes are, should be, genderized. They are simply clothes. If they fit, you can wear them. I believe people who identify as a crossdresser fall under the transgender spectrum. You can go as minimal or as far as you want. What I think people are really wanting to know is that they want to look a certain way but are unsure of how to do so.
There is a look they want to achieve but they are uncertain about the practical part how do I determine my size or wear makeup or the psychological part how do I accept myself. Achieving your look takes time, practice, mistakes and money. It takes time and patience. No one expects the first time they paint something that it will be a masterpiece. Be easy on yourself the first or even the fiftieth time you dress up or apply makeup.
Let me first state tips on crossdressing I am not speaking for the entire transcommunity. I am not saying these are the standards and expectations you must meet in order to be trans. You are transgender if you say you are transgender. I have seen gorgeous women with facial hair and have met many transwomen who wear jeans and sneakers and no makeup. The term transgender covers a lot of different ways that one can identify as…genderqueer, bi-gender, crossdressing, agender…the list continues to grow.
What I am writing about here covers some of the basic topics I get asked about shopping, makeup, shaving and going out.
What is passing? Who decides if you pass or not? Who has the right to decide if you look feminine enough? What does that even mean? Women, whether trans or cis, all look different. Some cis-women are tall, have broad shoulders, hands of all sizes and have different facial features. Some are taller than cis-men. Some have deep voices. Some have facial hair. Of course not. All cis-women are women if they choose to identify that way, of courseall transwomen are women, no matter how anyone looks.
What do I care if someone thinks that I am not beautiful? What do I care if someone knows that I am transgender? I am transgender. You are the only one that gets to decide if you are beautiful. And you are.
However, I also remember the early days of dressing up, going out and being comfortable. It was a roller coaster of emotions. I think all of us go through swings of self-esteem. I certainly did at first and it still happens from time to time. I think what helps me get through them is just accepting and loving myself and not worrying about what other people might think. I think sometimes our self-esteem is so tied up in how we feel about how we look.
The first time I did my own makeup was also a humbling experience. What changed? Time passed and as it did, I got better at makeup, I purchased a better wig, I started to dress better and wore clothes that fit. We all want to be a size 6 and some of us want to buy the tiniest dress at the mall, but wearing a dress and looking good in a dress are two different things.
After years of crossdressing, I was finally coming into my look. I was happy, and still am. I also accepted who I was and became happier with who I am. Acceptance tips on crossdressing lead to confidence, which le to happiness. Look at these two pictures below. They were taken a little over two years apart from each other. Two completely different girls, in my opinion. I started to let go of impossible expectations and learned to accept myself and to love myself and be happy with who I am and how I looked.
I stopped trying to pass and focused on what Tips on crossdressing wanted to wear and learning how to look how I wanted to look. Time and experience and practice pays off. And really, once you accept that and believe it, going out of the house or even just looking in the mirror becomes a million times easier. I promise. Clothes are easy and hard at the same time. To find clothes that fit, you just need to try them on.
Not sure what dress size you are? Try on several sizes to find the right fit. A rule of thumb is going one or two sizes up from your male clothes. Shoes are similar.
I have a small waist but broad shoulders which means I can wear a small sized skirt an 8, for example but I need a size 12 dress depending on the material because I am wider on top than I am in my middle. Of course, this is very much a rule of thumb as every department store and deer has a different idea about sizing. More on that in a moment. Find a measuring tape not the tool kit kind and take your measurements for different parts of your body:. Once you know your measurements, shopping, especially online, becomes easier. Most shopping tips on crossdressing will give you your size whether you are a size 14 or an extra large, for example if you know your measurements.
Finding clothes that fit takes time. Finding clothes that are appropriate for your age and body type takes practice. You will spend a lot of money making mistakes when you buy clothes. The only way to find out what will fit is to actually try it on. Finding the right sized clothes took a long time for me and will take a long time for you. Good thing shopping is fun!
The hard part is plucking up the courage to try things on in a store. Luckily the internet exists. You can shop all you want online, buy things and send them back if they are the wrong size. Many of us start shopping online at crossdresser specific stores such as Glamour Boutique, Xdressand En Femme.
Personally I enjoy going to a store to shop. The rule of thumb is be friendly, chatty, gracious and polite. Sure, you might get an odd look from someone at the store, it happens. It gets easier the more you do it. Go somewhere else. Makeup is hard.
No one learns makeup on their own. These two photos are examples of me doing my own makeup and were taken about two years from each other. There is a world of difference between them. I am happy with my makeup and I am confident in my technique. Earlier I said that no one creates a masterpiece the first time they paint. Nor will they the fiftieth time they paint. It took a lot of practice.
I made a lot of mistakes. I spent a lot of money. Again, you are learning by doing. You could watch youtube videos and learn from them but like tips on crossdressing clothes, everyone is different. Everyone has different skin, different color, different tone. What works for me might not work for you. The easiest way to learn makeup is to have someone teach you.
I am lucky to be married to my wife for many reasons. In my early days she taught me makeup. She is a tips on crossdressing cosmetologist and knew what tones and shades would work for my skin. I know not everyone is married to a makeup artist, but you can still learn.
Makeup is hard to get right. The best way to learn makeup is to schedule a makeover. Go to the experts, they will show you which products to use, which tones are best for your skin color and they will teach you how to apply makeup. They are trained to help girls like us. Makeup artists are also trained with the newest techniques, like contouring, which totally changed my life. Like clothes, makeup can be confusing as every cosmetic company has different products and shades. Foundation from Smashbox is different than foundation from Too Faced. Try different products, try different shades, mix it up, ask for help and see what works for you.
There are no rules with makeup, just do what works for you. I started to experiment with different blends and techniques and I finally found a way to completely cover up my beard line. Makeup is expensive, so be prepared for that. You get what you pay for when it comes to cosmetics. When starting out, I recommend buying inexpensive makeup to get the hang of it.Tips on crossdressing
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8 essential crossdressing tips for beginners (male to female transformation)